Ponderosa Party Productions Presents:

Beebe's Birthday Bash Bonanza!

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I don't know where to begin?.....So I'll start by getting a second cup of coffee, since after all I now have a years supply, better get to it while it's still fresh.

Ahhh, that's better!

I think the effects of this past weekends debauchery, are still lingering in my body. However the memories are as fresh as this second cup. My friends truly caught me by surprise! The fact that I had to chase off a couple of hoodlums that where skulking around in the darkness of Matt's patio, only delayed my entrance, not my shock. Shock only amplified when I realized the hoodlums where not infact hoodlums skulking around, but Hari and Clute - skulking around.

FLASHBACK: There I was, delaying my entrance as I admired Plow's new pond. After all, I had no idea there were people waiting for me inside, I figured Plow was still putting on his hair gel, and we were going out. I had at least 15 minutes before he was ready. Then, after admiring the new pond, I decided to check out the progress of Plow's new outdoor shower facilities. It was then that I noticed the two "hoodlums" hanging in the corner looking at me, like two raccoons caught raiding the trash can. Then the shock set in - matched on the outside I'm sure, by the look of confusion? I'm not sure how to describe that look (as it was on my face) but you can ask Hari or Clute. I attribute this look to the fact that my heart momentarily stopped, causing the blood to stop flowing to my brain, further causing an immediate lack of ability to process anything sensory.

"Where am I? Is this what the Twilight Zone is like? What are you guys doing here?"

Now I like to think that I am normally a pretty sharp cookie, quick on the uptake. But I still had no clue! Yeah sure, Gregg was down from Jersey and I hadn't seem him in awhile. That was a bit odd. But no odder than seeing Clute with a beard! It wasn't until they told me I had to go inside and act surprised, that I actually started to make the move indoors.

Lest you think that I wasn't surprised when I walked through the door - think again! If only I could have had a wide angle shot of that crowd, to keep the memory alive forever!

There before me, were my friends. A eclectic mix to be sure. There were my normal friends. By normal I mean the one's I talk to regularly, but I also mean the one's that have a "normal" appearance. These are the normal-normal group. They could be further divided into normal-normal-normal, but that isn't necessary. Then there were my friends, who are also normal, but not regular. This is not to say they are a constipated group, but one that I don't see often. This therefore is the normal-abnormal group. Then there is the abnormal group. The abnormal group can be further divided into abnormal-normal: the ones who are abnormal looking, but normal acting. This group could be further subdivided into abnormal-normal-regular, unless of course they are constipated in which case they are abnormal-normal-irregular or abnormal-normal-constipated. I'm not sure if anyone at the party actually fits into the last group? Then there was the abnormal-abnormal. This is a special group, a man unto himself. The exact scientific classification of this group is still being debated, but science is leaning towards A-A-DoM. That's abnormal-abnormal-diarrhea of mouth. There is also some debate among some of the "fringe" scientists, over this group actually being human at all, with the common belief that it is actually an alien life form who has merely taken on human appearance. This being further supported by the continuous display of awkward "human like" behavior and a general magnetic repulsion to anyone who's initials aren't CNN. Throw all these elements together, and mix with a little mom and dad, some well cooked lamb, a little Ponderosa magic fairy dust, some salt, some pepper a lot of great beer and you have the makings of the party of the decade.

And that's what I'm calling it. The party of the decade. At least, my decade. It was a fitting end to my 30's an outstanding welcoming in, to my 40's. I wouldn't have changed a thing.

Lastly, I would like to thank all of you for your participation. I'd list everyone's name, but I'm deathly afraid I would end up forgetting someone! However I want to make a special acknowledgement to Flash, CNN and Jojo for the wonderful job they did providing me with counter-intelligence, and all the other bells and whistles they added. Big Plow for hosting the party. It's one for the Ponderosa record books. And lastly Tim for masterminding this whole event. I heard it said somewhere that "everyone love's PinF" - I know I do! (cue Brokeback)