"Listen up fat-asses"

Mean Chuck here, stepping in for MoC, with a public service announcement -

Because I know that all of you need to lose a few pounds, and it's not open for discussion - you do, I'm going to let you in on my little secret...The Polar Heart Rate Monitor (see above).

Now I know that all of you prefer to go through life as the autonomous robots that you are, but should you decide to get off your fat-asses and exercise - this is a must have.

Let me repeat that, with capitalization for emphasis - THIS IS A MUST HAVE!

And really, even if you don't want to exercise, this is still a must have for weight loss.

It's a simple equation, burn more calories than you consume and you lose weight. How do you know if you are burning more calories than you consume, when you don't know how many calories you consume or how many calories you burn? And again, it's not open for discussion - you don't.

This will at least tell you how many you expend, even while sitting around on your fat-ass, and the battle is then half won.

This concludes Mean Chucks P.S.A.

Words of the Day for Saturday

"I used her services, but only for massages..."

"I don't recall..."

"Mission accomplished..."

Scoundrels.
Caitiffs.
Cheats, crooks, dastards.
Good-for-nothings.
Incorrigibles, knaves, lowlifes, maggots.
Mischief-makers, miscreants, ne'er-do-wells, pricks, rascals, reprobates, rogues, scalawags, scamps, sleazeballs, slime buckets, wretches and with all do respect to Cher - gypsies, tramps and thieves....

Did I forget anything?

MGS

MGS - that's short for Mars Global Surveyor and while this is a bit of an old story, it's raining today and I need something to do, so I'm going to make fun of NASA. Pictures to be coming soon over at the gallery....

It seems that after serving faithfully for 10 years, the MGS finally burned up like the wings of Icarus after engineers uploaded the wrong bit of code to the surveyor. When they tried to correct the initial problem, the solar panels ended up getting point directly at the sun which caused the batteries to overheat.

Oops!

New Table

So, MoC decided to begin furnishing his new apartment and went out and got himself a doozy of a new table - cocobolo.

Say it - "cocobolo." It just rolls off the tongue.

So check it out, it's an original, one of a kind, hand made, real piece of furniture and MoC might have to give up beer for a month in order to balance the books.

It will be available for viewing at my new location upon delivery.

Monday update

Well I've got good news, it's your lucky day!



That's right. Your here, and you are actually rewarded with something new to read! Now, if I can only make it entertaining....let me apologize up front, it probably won't be. That said let's get started, but let me back up a bit -



The past month I've jumped right back into the carpentry field and managed to smash my thumb only once. However, that has kept me pretty busy and left little time for blogging. In addition, not having an Internet connection of my own, made it a bit harder to get online.



That has all been resolved. Yesterday, Comcast was here to hook me up and I've signed my life away getting one of their "bundle" packages - Cable, Internet (high speed of course), Phone, morning coffee and laundry service. It's the deluxe package and I think I'm paying $250/month.



Of course, having my Internet hooked up, means that I have to have a wall for the cable to stick out of. This was resolved last week when I found a nice little apartment in Media (see picture). My thanks to PokerPro for helping me, or in this case reverse helping me. By not being in the office on any of the one, two, three occasions that I stopped in, I was forced to find an apartment from someone other than Media Real Estate.





Here's a picture of the new command center. I'm enjoying a Monday morning before work in my own living room, watching sport center and typing a blog. Now if I could only figure out when Comcast will get here to make me some coffee?

BREAKING NEWS!

Stop the presses!

We interrupt my regularly scheduled blog for a breaking news story!

No, it's not that Imus was fired.

No, it's not that Larry Birkhead is the father.


Snatched from Philly Inquirer this morning, something everyone of you should be concerned about. Or at least me -

'Gonorrhea gaining resistance to drugs'

And Philadelphia not being one to shy away from a challenge and put up a good fight, is leading the nation among heterosexual men with the highest percentage of drug-resistant infections! A group that I am proud to include myself in!

Uh, that being the heterosexual group, not the infected heterosexual group with the drug resistant infection.

My summer recreation plans might have to change....

Easter

While the rest of the world sleeps, the cast and crew of MisAdventures of Chuck blog are hard at work bringing you the best of the blog-O-sphere* and as Poker Pro says " a reason to go to work on Monday!"



This morning I set out for the Seven Stone to get my morning cup of pick-me-up only to be greeted by a "closed for Easter" sign.

"Hmmm, let's try the koffee korner" I think to myself. No luck. "Closed for Easter" the sign says, right below the sign stating that "long haired freaky people need not apply..."

Now MoC is starting to get pissed!

"Closed" is anti-Easter for crying out loud.

Resurrection? Rebirth? Celebration? These are all things synonymous with being "OPEN."

Closed? Closed is death. Closed is black. Closed is withdrawal. Closed is rejection. Closed is Frederique van der Wal's most holy spot.

MoC doesn't like closed. MoC doesn't subscribe to closed. MoC may have to sacrifice a fluffy bunny and go frolic with Pan in protest....


Happy Easter everyone.


*based on an unofficial survey

April is here, and I saw flurries

Well it's been a light week for MoC, only 15 hours, accompanied by a rare weekday off, so I used that time productively and got caught up on a bunch of stuff.

.....WHOA, WHOA, WHOA - cool your brains down and stop red-lining, you don't want to overheat! I know what you're saying; "A light week? A rare day off? The guy doesn't work!"

Well that was "MoC 2006 - year of the unemployed." This is MoC 2007 - year of the entrepreneur" we're talking about and being an entrepreneur takes money. So it's back to work. Besides, my Ameriprise Financial Planner told me that if I ever hoped to conquer the universe, it might be best to start with at least two nickles to rub together. So off I went...

Anyway, I had Tuesday off and took advantage of the time to do my taxes for last year. Turns out it really was the "year of the unemployed" as I hit an all-time low in income! I'm so proud of myself! Now, just when I was getting a handle on the whole barter thing, BANG!, life sucks me back into the 9-5 like a Dyson sucks dust. Crap. Oh well, no one said being an entrepreneur was easy.

Tuesday I have a meeting with my people. That's right, MoC has people. All kinds of people in fact, but Tuesday I'm meeting with my web people. Some of you may know my web people or at least one of them. He comments here sometimes as "Pecker." He's also been known to play the straight man to PinF's jokes.....

Pecker and his company are going to design my website for "singmysong.com" which is a little idea I had that I thought might be fun to pursue. So I am. It should be making it's debut sometime towards the middle of the summer. Look for it.

Until then.

Entrepreneur out.